Disingenuous

I was a card carrying freak (hippie) from 1968 to 1971. I believed in the counter-culture (in fact the concept still looks good today) and worked hard to live an open and shared life. I took drugs like Tim Leary, wandered like Jack Kerouac, had the morals of Grace Slick; spent time in jail for possession like dozens of my friends. The saddest days of my life were spent mourning the counter-culture when it nose dived after the illusion called Woodstock. I guess part of me knew it was over when I saw the first Peter Max psychedelic 7-UP ad on ABC-TV. I had held on for 2 years (I felt like a dog, as long as these years were).

The Summer of 1970, I broke every vow I had made and ripped off some items from friends' houses to pawn for cash. This was Prime Directive stuff when you're talking shared life, communal living. I staggered to a Zen Commune in Baltimore and got better. By New Year's 1971, out of the commune, I was bad shape again, lost, with no idea where I was going. The counter-culture was splitting into 50 different pieces, and I was roaming the slums of Baltimore.

I got found in a Jesus House in the heart of the deadest part of that city. Over a number of days, I found and received the Christian message and its power. I became a believer in Christ 2 years to the day after I first took LSD. They were both earth shaking experiences. I don't know if one could have happened without the other.

So, knowing this, am I disingenuous to call this blog "Almost a Christian?"

Over the past 8 years, I have come to see some things differently that I did before. My attitude about the role of women in society, abortion, homosexuality and gay marriage are different than positions taken by most believers in Jesus and the Bible. I certainly would be expelled from thousands of churches because of my views, branded a heretic by some.

After Jerry Falwell died, I asked several of my friends if they thought he was a Christian, knowing the disgrace he had brought to the name of Christ by his comments about Katrina and homosexuality. The first "Jesus hates Fags" sign I saw was at a Moral Majority rally (I was not there). You'd think Jerry could have stopped that if he had spoken to its impropriety.

Questioning Falwell's faith certainly re-inforced my heresy to many. If I am thought a heretic, why not accept that? I guess that makes me "almost a Christian" indeed. Thankfully, Jesus knows what I am.

Nothing disingenuous here